some random photos..
everything is just too late..
watever..
it doesn't matter anymore..

Dream can be terrible..
I need a break..
I am very scared..

I am really happy for others
but i am sad
it is contrary
i just dunno why

I tried to be very busy to keep my mind from thinking..
Perhaps it doesn't work..
This week was indeed busy and packed..
But i never failed to recall everything..
Even the music blasted on me..
I'm not tat strong..
Sorry..
I miss you very much..

FML

This morning started with a good mood..
Hoping to eat the chicken rice which is super duper nice..
Before that went to ask bout renewing my IC and they said they need more than 2 weeks..
Okay i wasted my purpose of wearing the collar tee..
Went to banks with mum and only realized adults visit banks so often..
My mum said adults have to count their money very often..
Fine then we walked to the chicken rice shop thru' petaling street..
Who knows we saw the bomba van..
Ya it's a van in red colour..
Didn't bother at all and continue walking..
Saw big karipuff which long time never eat..
Planned to buy after the chicken rice..
Walk towards the end of the shops..
And saw the ashes and smokes were all around the street..
Coming from a shop..
And EDIBLE chickens were seen just beside the source of the smoke..

G.R.E.A.T.

Ps: i have enough d and i'm tired..please stop!!

i love this pics very much..
but my tears just won't stop..
sorry I'm not tat strong..
i wanna go somewhere tat no one knows me..
just me and my cam..
ya..
we broke up..
i hate myself..
don't ask..
please..
i'm not tat strong..
i'm guilty..
dun ask me ok or not..
you will just remind me how ugly i am..
i'm ok but i'm not..

People this is wat i did during the 1st night of my cam bought=)
It's slow shutter (bulb)
Tripod and handphone were utilized=)
This is just a testing shots..
Mainly for fooling around only..

my love for my baby=)

red lovey heart for baby panda=)

an irregular "O"..

tak macam star langsung=)
haha..

it was supposed to be an OMG..
but but but..

I love the arrows..
Inspiration for this came at the end before the batt dies..

Ps : these are been photoshop-ed =) colour balance, brightness and contrast..

Sorry guys, have been busy with my "assignment"..
Haha, so 1 day i told myself..
"Do i really wan my camera to collect dust?"
Hell no!!
Then i grab it and went to my so-called yard to take some photos..
And i found out exposure meter which is extremely useful..
Still got long way to go=)

this is a type of fern-leaves i think..

it always reminds me of the milk powder=)

actually it was a bit over-exposed but i wan it to be in the lime green=)

i never knew that my mum actually got this flower..

it's not under-exposed and it's due to the ambiance lighting..

layu d not enough water..

this is over-exposed but somehow i like it..

dandelion-like plant (bile's favourite)

focus off aikzz..

i like this..

this is obviously over-exposed and have no subject in this pic..
but if you can observe carefully you can actually see a fly on the leaf..
just like a bug's life=)

some plant=)





That's all..
Hopefully i didn't discriminate DSLR=)
Cheers ppl=)

Ps : all these photos did photoshop-ed before, but they are only added with the brush i did (my name and the cute creature) at the either left or right bottom corner, other than that are orginal

F.I.N.A.L.L.Y

Present you Canon EOS 450D..
Just so you know, this cam caused me to save up my money for 3 sems..
Well, after having egg-and-vege meals for the sem..
the effort finally paid off!!
So, let me tell you the story of the wonderful Monday..

I woke up quite early that morning..
So it happened that the reminder of asking for the price of the camera pop out in my mind..
Then, i browsed thru' the forum and dialed up for the shop's number..
I actually called 4 or 5 times to confirm everything whether the camera is REAL or not with the surprisingly cheap price..
I called Ritchie and he said ok..
I called my mum and she said she can pay using her credit card..
And they do not charge any extra charges on credit card payment..

This is wonderful but it was the last one in the shop..
My mum said gonna purchase on tue 'cause she did not have her credit card..
So, I tell myself,
"If you are that unlucky, then go for Nikon 3000D."
Actually is a self comforting while watching 2012 in my pc..
Yeah i gave up watching it in cinema..

Suddenly, my phone rang and I thought is baby..
Guess who was on the line?
My mum =)
"You wanna get it today or not? If want get the credit card and meet me at the AIA building."
Okay, my mum is so efficient..
"Ok, why not? but I have tl dial up to confirm for the availability."
I was so nervous while calling the shop..
And again my mum is so efficient!

Thank God that they could reserve the cam for me..
I went down and sms-ing all my friends to check the camera whether it is ok to buy or not?
And P.O.P..
My DSLR is just on my lap=)

Ps : my baby panda gonna be my fulltime model=)
PPs : I still owe my mum money (RM 2450)
PPPs : I played something interesting last night..
PPPPs : Please remind me to register for the warranty! haha..

And mind you this DSLR is not my baby..
I have only 1 baby=)

the year..

Throughout the year we've been together, lots of memory were captured and remembered. Not matter the good ones or the precious ones or the bad ones. Good and precious ones always a treasure to many people but they are often covered by the bad memory. I admit that I have not done my responsibility well as a boy friend of my baby. Lots of mistakes and stupidities have made the tears. Indeed, I'm not a prefect yet a good one.

I always wanted to find excuses to bring my baby for a walk for the night. I was such a fool who couldn't understand my baby at all. All she wanted is the time of me and her. That's all. However, my baby did not angry for my ignorance, she put her sadness into herself and did not show it to me. Tears were fallen and heart was broken from time to time. And my eyes were blinded like a fool who could not put myself in her shoes.

I was and am self-centred. All I thought was just my feeling and not others'. All I asked all the while why is she not caring about my feeling whereas I also didn't care about her at the same time. I always get frustrated why wasn't she replying my messages, stupid me, I didn't even have the right to do so at all.

My baby wants a short hair and boy's outfit, but sometimes I do not agree with her. Come to think, why should I care? Cannot cut short hair la, wear skirt or dress la and all those non-sense. Do they necessary to make her as my baby? No! Even she wanted to be a boy so much and I would just answer, "I don't mind being a gay=) " Even if she wore guy's outfit to the prom with me, I would say, "We are the best gay couple for the night."

Why am I felt so offended for what my baby like? She is just being herself all the while and just let it be. Of course bad habits should be corrected and guided, but being a so-called semi-tomboy won't be categorized in the unhealthy lifestyle right. Mind you it is just semi=)

I felt angry when I saw all the words in her blog. I thought it would be a very bad habit. And worse, whenever my friends talk about this "why your gf so good in that?" and it really add some gun powder into my flame of anger. Sorry guys, you guys did not say anything wrong, just that it affect me when I get started to judge people on how they judge my gf. And I like FINALLY accepted that when I think of different people have different ways of expressing. Just like guys, we all shout all the foul words without even thinking we are actually cursing people's mothers when anger engulfed us. And why can't girls or your girlfriends do that? Just because you think guys can swear like a macho and girls swear are like *itch? If you can control you verbal manners then fine, you got the right to voice out, but don't say anything if you can't do the things that you wanted others to do.

My baby has obviously changed alot better just because of my naggings. Even now all you can see are those tiny puny little erhem erhem foul words in her blog. She thought guys with spectacles are blind. Hmmm.

Talking nag, there are times I was way too over. If you are her so-called loyal blog reader, you might notice this (most recent one) and about the calculator 1. It was not the message I wanted to convey, but fine la. Hehe. Talk also useless already 'cause the words you said can never be taken back. The words stuck in her mind which made her unhappy all the while. There are things that I didn't notice will hurt her but I did it. I really meant to be good. Trust me.

Love is easy and hard at the same time 'cause everyone is not perfect. I have learnt to accept like what my baby did. I have learnt to be patience and be cool. Love is not a textbook but it teaches you to appreciate, to care, to sacrifice, to adapt and to love. I would say, I never regret to send out the message on that night.

I'm really sorry for everything that i have done. Love you.

Love,
baby pork pie




Ps: I'm not good in writing as always=)

our 1st=)

if it's a kiss for my baby..
Why there is a tongue?
Weird huh?

Ps : Tomorrow need to work..can't write much here 'cause gonna catch up with my bed=) tomorrow only tell grandpa's story=) And btw if you guys din get wat i mean..just read the title..if i were wanna give 1 shot surprise..but is a super duper surprise..is it a good idea? haha=)

This post is mainly for those who doesn't know what is RECTANGULAR meat ball..
And here you go i captured today's morning..

sometimes..

Sometimes you just wanna speak out but you are afraid of the consequences..
Sometimes you are limited by your fear of telling out will drive you crazy..
Freedom of voice out??
Perhaps no..

forgive..

Quote for the day..

"When deep injury is done to us,
we never recover until we forgive,
forgiveness does not change the past,
but it does enlarge the future."

by Mary Karen Read.

This quote is catchy and so meaningful..
I find it very true..
Sometimes we just need to let it go..
Forgiving is hard and it needs massive of courages..
And it does enlarge the future..
Like wat mary karen said..
Well said..

all of the sudden..

i miss my baby tat much~~~
baby panda=)
<3<3<3

pictures..

taken on the way back from the community service=)




Quote for the day:


"No one is perfect and do not judge others by their talents, if you think you are talented enough and so-called perfect, DO remind yourself that you are NOT."




God is always the fair one..
Everyone is gifted..
In different way..





Squash today yeah!!

our 9th..

Today is actually our 9th month anniversary..
Not too long yet not too short..

We had been thru' things and moments..
We had shared tears and joys..

And i never regretted to take my 1st move to hold your hand at the very 1st time..

We didn't celebrate it like wat others do 'cause mayb we don't fancy this kinda stuff..
Baby is still busy with her tests and stuffs..

Best of luck to my baby panda..


Though baby forgot wat's today's date..
Man i miss my baby panda!!


Ps : I love you=)






"You come to love not by finding the perfect person,
but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly."


Sam Keen.

the porky and panda..

It can be vividly recall how our 1st date turned out to be and i can still remember how i get the guts to hold your hands..

Things change when time passes but i admit i did something wrong in the past..
I learned to be patience as you taught me to and now i rarely get angry which makes myself more ugly..


our 1st date in UTP jogging track..


moments in undercroft where i met some spooky stuff in Haliburton..
(porky and panda)


baby peep peep huh?? is this the one when baby's toe broke??

Baby panda said need a break and i wouldn't mind at all..
But i will always there for you..
The ways baby treated me with care i will not forget..
I can recall how shy i was used to be..
The meal, the drinks, the help, the car rides, the stay in baby's house and not to forget the tickles and the bites..


PAIN=)


All are sweet memories and i hope it will be the long lasting practice..
The bites and tickles are like a trademark on my body..
But baby, it hurts sometimes =P
And baby panda never mind my face and how my pimples spread their territory..
Damn you acnes!!



outside the chancellor hall..

the talent search=)



Sometimes i might be careless and hurt baby panda but trust me..
It's not intentionally..
I would always wanna make things right..
Sometimes effort alone is not enough..


baby panda oink-ing~~


1 more week it will be our 8th month anniversary from the official date at pangkor..
However we had been together more than 8 months..
From the day before mid sem break of our very 1st sem in UTP=)


the place where we held hands=)

ugly~~~



Remember our 1st Valentine's at the train station??
And the roses..
haha i had to do the roses like a mouse just to avoid being seen by baby=)
funny huh??



baby's 1st roses for baby panda=)
credit for hanshen for the tutorial..



Living in UTP never makes our life brighter..
We even organized an zap gor meh during the last day of CNY..
We actually fought about the matric card matter in front of karen..
Sorry=P




i seriously like the cardigan=)




Our very 1st award in UTP..
See how smart is my baby panda=)

my smart baby panda=)




And here we go for the present..

we quarreled but...

we forgave each other..

And here is the another happy day..

















Last but not least..
I just wanna say..
I'm sorry for any mistakes..
I love you, Henna..
I wanna hold you forever like never ending..
Though "forever" is just an idealization..

satisfy..

Come to think..

This world will never be fair..

This world will never be perfect..

Fair and perfect world is just only an idealization..

We often say wanna fight for the right ones..

But does it really worth??

Sometimes things can be just unfair for no reasons..

You work hard and get shit..

Others do nothing but get to shit on you..

Wat a good thing huh??

Learn to be satisfied..

There are endless of goals to be achieved..

Higher and greater goals are awaited after you accomplish achieving the current goals..

Is like an endless journey..

There is no terminal but your death..

Appreciate everything..


Continue study physical chem..
Hungry and feel like bathing..
=)

Ps : photo coming tmr k..tired..haha..

tested..

These few weeks i was tested by ppl..

The limit of patience and all i can say tat it was ok 'cause i take it not hard..

Ppl always have the habit to test something out..

We test the chemicals in lab..

We see the resistance of the thing in circuit..

We even grab the sand and classify them and show to ppl wat's sand actually..

And we do like to test others patience..

It is like a patience endurance test..

Try not to blame lecturers too much 'cause we are all the same..

We like to fail ppl and it's can be considered as a joy of failing ppl..

Ya it doesn't harm but indirectly we are the killers..

We kill them by failing them..

Isn't how the lecturers kill us??

You can actually play with the testing-patience- game and it's fun..

But not everyone's patience has big capacity..

Some maybe like the 100 mL small conical flask..

Some do have big beaker of patience in them..

The theory is the same..

If you heat the conical flask for too long..

Crack can be seen and if you can't the crack..

Tat's it BOOM!!

Won't get killed don't worry..

But you will know how to pay the consequences for your doing..

Come to think..

Should i stop teasing karen??

Perhaps a NO=)

mail..

I just received one mail from my fren and it is really meaningful..
Now i realized words can be any form and there are powerful..
Just few lines they can actually kill you=)

It is about MONEY..

Money..

It can buy a house.
But it can't get you a HOME.

It can buy a bed.
But it can't get you a SLEEP.

It can buy a clock.
But it can stop the TIME.

It can buy books.
But not KNOWLEDGE.

It can buy a position.
But it can't earn you RESPECT.

It can buy medicine.
But not HEALTH.

It can buy blood.
But it can't create Life.

Lastly,
it can buy SEX.
But it can't get you LOVE.




=)

I found it very interesting and wanna share wif you ppl..
Cheer up baby~~~
Know you stress la..
Sayang~~~

away..

People tmr am going to go back to UTP to begin my very 1st year of my degree..

Ya people are right..like may fren said "foundation only ma..belum naik undergrade yet.."

Haha ok lo..few more days i'm officially started my degree in Chemical Engineering=)

FYI my degree is actually 4 years..

Engineering bah and plus the foundation is one year..

So total up the math will tell i have to finish my degree in 5 years time..

To be exact i must finish within the duration given of 5 years..

Due to bla bla bla contract with petronas..

This evening i talked to my mum bout my academic stuff..

I actually considering of going to overseas under petronas..

If not mistaken there are some exchange programmes going on..

She agreed and i'm still consider..

There are lotsa things i'm worried and heavy-hearted to let go..

Sigh let's not talk bout this..

I'm aiming for the 3rd year industrial training going to overseas..

How i wish i could go to Dubai..

Imagine i earn my 1st US Dollars..

Drooling..haha..

Damn!!! haha i know is big dream..

But sometimes is good to be abit over-ambitious=)

Ok cut the crap..

Back to going-back-to-utp story..

Well just wanna say something la..

It's abit sad la leaving home..

I dunno i'll miss my parents tat much after leaving to UTP..

I'm actually mummy or papa boy=)

I think i never did this thing in my life before..

I bet you guys never did this before too..

It was last week i think..

I was craving for chicken rice and it's kinda hard to find a Hainan chicken rice in anywhere else d..

Coincidentally my mum needed to go to hospital to take her medicine..

So i tagged along=)

For the sake of chicken rice?? haha..

Now mummy doesn't have a car and the hospital is hell far away..

But wat to do?? my mum get cheap medicine 'cause she was a government servant=)

We went by bus and I thought i would fall asleep during the whole journey in the bus but i didn't..

I was chatting with my mummy=)

Skip the hospital part and jump to the climax part..

We went to eat the chicken rice and it can't be described in any words=)

Tooooooooooooooooooooooooo good~~~

Here is the best part..

We walked for whole kl town area and all the way we were chatting..

Awww..mummy and son moment..haha..

I have never ever done this before and i was actually happy..

For the 19 years i felt tat i wasn't there for mummy all the time..

And now i know how to appreciate everything d..

It's indeed good tat UTP is at tronoh..

Which is freaking far and isolated to a KL guy like me..

Which i cannot go home every week..

Which i have to survive with my own..

And when things turn out to be like this..

We actually will appreciate wat we have..

The family and the house..

Warm house and my parents=)

If UTP is in kl i think i will driving back every week d..

Money will be spent like water..

Every weekend go CC burger hiking and yum cha..

Petrol money have to pay by using the 500!!

Haha but dun worry..

UTP will never shift to kl..

Ps : people see you there=)

quote of the day..

"The love ones will not see wat you have or wat are you going to have..
They see how sincere you are when you treat them.."

Off for transformers=)

thinking..

Is money tat important??

I guess so..

Money makes ppl happy huh??

I think everyone loves money more than anything or anyone else..

Who doesn't love money??

We do anything for money..

People said we are the slave of time..

But i said we are slave of money..

'cause we are doing everything for money..

"No money no talk.."

Without money are we something??

We are just so realistic.. Aren't we??

Bullshitting here..
Crap..
Rantings..

Cheers ppl..
Ignore this post..

adidas..

Did i ever mention tat i just newly bought a futsal shoes yesterday??

In case i didn't so i'm gonna write it out..

Ok let's start with some pathetic moments of futsal games in UTP..

Before this i was actually playing with the black cloth-shoes which i need to borrow the yellow cellophane tape from jeremy amboi to cover up the big hole on the shoes..

You see cloth-shoes memang tak tahan lasak so maybe this is the only concern for my maybe-future-converse shoes..

I broke my little toe when i was using tat cloth-shoes..
I nearly twisted my ankle when i was using tat cloth-shoes..

It was good to play on before the big hole appeared on tat shoes..

Shitt all those unhappy accidents happened when the shoes koyak=(

So my baby was bugging me coz i wasn't wearing a proper shoes to play futsal..

And then i use my casual shoes which is originally made for skaters..

It is heavy and i ran like an elephant..

Haha..ppl would always ask me "like tat also can play a??"

But wat to do?? no shoes ma..better than kaki ayam..

Now i bought an Adidas futsal shoes and my baby said..

"finally got a proper shoes d huh??"

Coincidentally i bought the black shoes with white strip and some gold writing on it which is the exactly the same with my virtual roommate..

Swt..even size also the same..UK size 8..

Now i wanna make a comparisson btw Edmund's and mine..

Here you go..the Questra lll IN..
















Don't you guys think is the same??

It's the same=)



Ps : only paint is used for the names=) and scroll down..the post hasn't ended yet..something interesting is awaited=)

not mine..

not mine...

not mine..

mine=)