Today little part of my heart died. The feeling is so familiar, but it is certainly not the best feeling you want. 

It is like you've expected you gonna flunk your quiz or test, and in the end, you got low marks, you still get upset where the disappointment shadowed your preparation to expect the worst. At the end of the day, you will spend whole night thinking what you could have done at the 1st place.

3 years and now it goes back to the starting point. I guess that's a life cycle.